I remember at some point this year i couldn't create no more, It was hard for me to create an event, make follow up with potential partners and sponsors, it was just hard. Nothing i touched was working out well. I was questioning so much about my purpose in life and the impostor syndrome had befallen me.
Interestingly during this time, i had found a coach, a mentor and a team to work with. My dream of having a team was becoming a reality but deep down i didnt feel ok. I experienced something i perceived as failure in one of my events get to me so much. It's one thing to fail secretly but failing publicly is on another level. This is because we set so much expectations for ourselves and when disappointment comes we are caught in this bubble not believing such a thing has happened to you.
For me, it has taken me a very long time to heal from it. In the midst of getting lost in my bubble and needing a mental break, i went on a soul searching mission. I wanted to be intouch with myself physically,mentally and spiritually.
The journey of becoming is one full of twists and turns, ups and down, laughter and tears. Initially when starting my company, i believed i had everything figured out and in 3 years time, i would be on another level individually and business wise.
After a much needed break, i am at a good place. I am aware of the mistakes i did and i have taken time to appreciate myself and be kind to me. During this time, i have invested in taking online courses that will help me improve on myself and my business and how i want to impact the youth.
My desire for working with the youth has not changed. The process to getting there has definitely been refined and re-invented but the end goal is the same.
For you my dear reader, i do not know at what stage you are in in whatever it is you want to do in life. My advice to you is that it is never a clear path. There will be pitstops along the way that will try to deter you but it is my sincere hope that you will find your way through it. And when you feel like life is calling you to take a break, please respect your body and do so. After all, what is the point of chasing success only for it to find you unwell mentally?
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